The era of public EVERYTHING

 

Welcome Back to this week’s conversation, fellow aunties and uncles, please gather here for today’s meeting because whew… this generation and oversharing?

We 👏🏾need 👏🏾to 👏🏾talk👏🏾.

 

One thing about us, we will post EVERYTHING.

You get flowers? Posted.

New relationship? Social media soft launch immediately.

New job? LinkedIn, Instagram stories, Twitter and WhatsApp status all at once.

Going through heartbreak? Suddenly everyone knows your business in real time.

You start gym? Daily mirror selfies.

You’re healing? We’re all invited into the healing journey against our will.

And before I continue, let me also confess that I’m guilty too 😭 Because yes, I also post my life sometimes. I Sometimes get excited and want to share moments in real time like everybody else. So this is not me acting superior or pretending I’ve mastered privacy perfectly because I’m still learning too.

And listen, I’m not saying sharing is bad. Human beings naturally want to celebrate, connect and express themselves. But somewhere along the way, our generation started confusing privacy with secrecy.

Now people feel guilty for keeping parts of their lives to themselves. And aunties and uncles, some things genuinely need protection.

What’s interesting is that now social media itself has slowly started recognising that maybe we are oversharing too much. What I’m trying to say is that when social media first became popular, we honestly did not have many options. You posted something and basically everybody saw it. But now,

platforms have introduced close friends lists, private accounts, disappearing stories, selective audiences and only share with certain people  features. And honestly, I don’t think that happened by accident.

Even social media apps now understand that not every moment is meant for the entire world. People are slowly craving smaller, safer spaces online. We want connection, yes, but we also want protection, boundaries and peace.

I think a lot of us learned this lesson after experiencing certain patterns in life.

You know that thing where something is going SO well quietly, then the moment you announce it too early, everything suddenly starts becoming stressful?

Yes, THAT.

I remember someone saying they got into a healthy relationship after years of terrible dating experiences. This time, they decided to post everything, including their matching outfits, cute dates, and TikToks. At first it was beautiful, however, at some point the relationship stopped feeling personal and started feeling performative.

Every disagreement suddenly felt heavier because now there was an audience attached to the relationship. People were so invested, such that friends started comparing, some people became weirdly intrusive, while others would make little comments disguised as jokes. The small energy shifts then turned into pressure, in a space that once felt peaceful. And after the breakup, they said the hardest part wasn’t even losing the relationship, it was feeling like they had to publicly explain a private pain because they had publicly performed the happiness.

That’s why these days some people intentionally keep relationships offline. Not because they’re unhappy or they’re hiding someone, but because they finally realised not every beautiful thing needs public access.

And honestly, relationships are not the only thing. People experience this with jobs, businesses, opportunities, pregnancies, finances, even friendships.

Someone starts a business idea and announces it before it’s fully stable. Suddenly everybody has opinions.

“You know businesses are failing these days right?”

“Are you sure that will work?”

“I know someone who tried that and it collapsed.”

Now doubt enters something that originally carried excitement. Or you tell people about a new opportunity too early, and suddenly you feel pressure before things are even confirmed. Now every person keeps asking how it’s going, they ask for updates etc, meanwhile you’re already anxious yourself.

Sometimes silence protects peace.

Our parents and grandparents understood this better than we do.

Back then people would disappear quietly, build their lives, then reappear successful.

Now, we announce chapter one before we’ve even written the introduction, and social media makes it worse because it constantly rewards visibility.

People now feel pressure to prove they are happy, they want to prove they are loved, successful, healing or living well.

But aunties and uncles, I’ve come to learn that some of the happiest people are actually very quiet. All you’ll hear about them is “Oh, they got married months ago. Oh, they bought a house. Oh, they’ve been building that business for two years?” And if you ask me? Sometimes that privacy protects the blessing.

Because the evil eye is real. And no, it does not always come from enemies. Sometimes it comes from people who are close to you and genuinely like you but still compare themselves to you. People can love you and still envy you at the same time.

That’s the uncomfortable truth nobody likes discussing.

Someone can support you while secretly grieving the life they wish they had.

Someone can clap for you while internally asking “why not me?” Of course not always with bad intentions, not always consciously, you will agree with me that energy is still energy.

And sometimes too many eyes on something precious changes the atmosphere around it.

That’s why wisdom is learning discernment.

Not everyone needs access to every part of you, not every moment needs documenting and not every blessing needs immediate announcement.

Some things deserve to be enjoyed fully before they are exposed to the world.

A seed grows underground first for a reason.

Imagine planting a seed and digging it up every five minutes just to show everybody that it’s growing.

That’s exactly what oversharing can do sometimes.

You interrupt the process, you expose things too early, you invite noise into spaces that needed nurturing.

And let me say this too; privacy is not pretending your life is perfect, privacy is simply deciding that some experiences belong to YOU first before they belong to the internet. You can be happy quietly, you can heal quietly, you can love quietly and you can win quietly. Not everything sacred needs an audience.

 

Anyway aunties and uncles, this week’s reminder is:

Protect what is still growing, move with love, celebrate your life, enjoy your blessings, but also learn when to keep certain things close to your chest. Because peace fellow aunties and uncles…peace loves privacy.

 

Just a quick one, I'd really love to hear from you. What other topics would you enjoy reading about on this blog? What conversations do you think we need more, that would make you feel seen, understood, or simply interested?

And to our older aunties and uncles too, your wisdom and experiences are always welcome here. Please feel free to share your ideas with me in the comments or via email at chifusaabigail3@gmail.com. I'm excited to grow this space with you

 

Until next time.

 

With love,

 

Your Resident New Aunty ❤️